Danica Patrick vs. Milka Duno – - Two Out Of Three Falls?

Now that a little time has passed since the pit-area dust-up between Danica Patrick and Milka Duno – - you have to have seen the video of that at least ten times by now on the various ESPN and FSN outlets – - I got to thinking about the “confrontation”. Just how many “confrontations” has Danica Patrick had with other IRL drivers now? Six? Eight? Ten? They all get covered in depth on ESPN and other sports outlets because of Danica Patrick’s celebrity status; and interestingly to me, that seems to be the only in-depth coverage that IRL gets just about anywhere outside of Indianapolis. Hmmm… These “confrontations” couldn’t be staged, could they?

If the latest “confrontation” were real, I might have expected Milka Duno – - whom I don’t know from a Milky Way candy bar – - to have taken a swing at the intruding and insulting Ms. Patrick. No male driver on the planet would dare do that as much as many might like to do that, but Ms. Duno could have taken sufficient umbrage to plant a right cross upside Ms. Patrick’s jaw line. If she had done that, I suspect that IRL would have promoted them for a boxing match with the winner to take on Tonya Harding.

So, what is the OVER/UNDER for when Danica Patrick’s victories exceed the number of these dust-ups she has with other drivers?

    a. 2010

    b. 2015

    c. The Twelfth of Never – - and that’s a long, long time… [/Johnny Mathis]

I happened upon a SF Giants/Washington Nationals game recently whilst grazing through the cable sports channels. I watched a few innings between these two wretched teams before I simply had to change the channel. However, in that brief time I did make an observation that I thought I would never make. Benjie Molina is even slower now than he has been before. Last year, he could have made it from first-to-third in less time than it takes to whip up a serving of veal cordon bleu. Today, I’m not sure…

The Pirates’ trade with the Yankees makes the Pirates quest for their first winning season in the last 16 years more difficult than it was – - and it was going to be difficult enough without that trade. Coming back from nine games under .500 with 57 games left will not be easy with that pitching staff…

The NFL announced that they will stream live broadcasts of their Sunday Night Football games over the Internet starting in September. Lots of folks see this as the NFL looking to embrace modern technologies and to reach out to grab even more viewers. That’s probably true. But here is what I don’t understand…

Why is NBC so happy to let this happen? It would seem to me that making the games available on the Internet can only reduce the number of folks watching them on TV; that means lower ratings; that means lower advertising rates; that can’t make NBC affiliates thrilled. What am I missing here…?

The other networks will not put their games on the Internet and the NFL says that the playoffs and Super Bowl will not be on the Internet. If this is such a slam-dunk great idea, how come no other network is jumping in here? And why is the NFL going to keep its showcase games – - playoffs and Super Bowl – - off the Internet?

Quick Quiz: Which will happen first…?

    a. Danica Patrick has more victories than “confrontations” with other drivers.

    b. Michael Vick gets an endorsement deal from Petco.

    c. David Stern utters the words, “I don’t know,” in that sequence.

    d. Dr. Myles Brand gets something right.

    e. ESPN realizes that it never should have hired Emmitt Smith in the first place.

I read an item which said that Rush Limbaugh told the St. Louis Business Journal that he might be interested in putting together a consortium of investors that would try to purchase the St. Louis Rams. Can you picture the mayhem at one of the NFL owners’ meetings if Rush Limbaugh, Jerry Jones and Daniel Snyder all see a TV camera at the same time and start a mad dash to be the one in front of the lens? That collision might rival the ones anticipated in the bowels of the Large Hadron Collider in Switzerland…

The Olympics begin in less than two weeks. Eight is a lucky number in China and the Opening Ceremonies will be on 8/8/08. The PGA will hold its final major tournament of the year – - the PGA Championship – - from 8/7/08 through 8/10/08. With Tiger Woods on the shelf, the PGA was already going to be a ratings nightmare for golf when compared year-over-year with 2007. Add to that the fact that this is the opening weekend of the Olympics and it will not be surprising if the PGA ratings fall below the “Jesse Ventura Line” – - the nadir of the XFL ratings at 2.0.

Finally, here are two comments regarding the recently concluded British Open:

“The British Open became the latest golf major to be blown by Greg Norman. It probably wasn’t a good sign when Norman was accompanied on the first tee last Sunday by medics prepared to administer the Heimlich maneuver.” [Greg Cote, Miami Herald]

“Greg Norman, only golfer ever to lose all four majors after leading going into the final round. The Grand Slammed.” [Scott Ostler, SF Chronicle]

But don’t get me wrong, I love sports…

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