Bad Boys, Bad Boys …

First, let me comment about two NFL “bad boys”. Marshawn Lynch, RB-Bills, was involved in a hit and run situation more than three weeks ago. After subpoenas were issued to three of his teammates and to several officers of the Buffalo Bills Football Club, it seems that Lynch and his attorneys have reached an agreement for a plea bargain. He will plead guilty to two driving violations and serve no jail time for either one. Meanwhile, the victim, who was a temporary hood ornament on Lynch’s auto, is out of the hospital and has retained the services of a personal injury attorney. The bottom line:

    The Bills still have a running back who is wearing their colors and not orange overalls.

    Lynch may face a short suspension from Roger Goodell but he will not serve that suspension in a cell with a cellmate nicknamed Titan’s Ramrod.

    The victim will be cashing a sizeable check part of which will pay for her silence on the matter.

    And so it goes…

Adam – please do not call me “Pacman” anymore – Jones has been made into a victim and a sympathetic figure. That is not an easy transition; “The Corner Back Formerly Known As Pacman” (TCBFKAP) would have to elevate his life several notches to qualify as a ne’er-do-well. Nevertheless, Don Imus made another of his “edgy” and “sarcastic” comments about “TCBFKAP” and now a lot of folks feel as if Jones is the victim here.

Jones wants to be called Adam Jones from here on out. I have no idea how the Orioles’ outfielder feels about the possible confusion here, but that is for the outfielder and TCBFKAP to work out. This is just a guess on my part, but TCBFKAP would probably be happy to be known as “Pacman” so long as he is never called “The Defendant” ever again.

Since I mentioned Jones, you must recall the incident that put him over the top as an anti-social miscreant where he “made it rain” at a Las Vegas strip club and a riot ensued and folks were shot and one person wound up paralyzed from the waist down. Now comes news that one of the women involved in that melee – one who allegedly got into a fight with some of the strippers over the dollar bills that were raining down – turned up in a NYC morgue recently. Her family seems to think she was thrown off the roof of an apartment building. Let me try to connect some dots here:

    Engages in fight with naked women at a strip club, shots fired disabling a security guard, dead body, allegations of her person being thrown off a roof resulting in a corpse, ties to an NFL bad-boy.

    Can the NFL tell me again why they put pressure on ESPN to cancel that mini-series about the NFL team that had so many miscreant players?

Don Imus was not the only person making remarks that might politely be described as “stupid beyond belief” in the last week. In a freestyle rap, Shaquille O’Neal lit into his former teammate and current bete noire , Kobe Bryant, with more than a couple of truly nasty comments. The most repulsive – and repeated – comment had to be:

“Kobe, tell me how my ass tastes…”

You can try to convince me about the nature of freestyling rap and how it intends to claim dominance over others by means of words and not actions. Even if I believe you, this line is over the line of marginally bad taste and fully into outrageous territory.

Meanwhile, the Sheriff of Maricopa County has revoked Shaq’s honorary deputy sheriff badge based on these comments. And that too is “over the line” regardless of my comments about outrageousness above. Everyone here needs to step back, look at what happened, and calm down for a moment:

    Shaq was an idiot – not a clown. What he said was not funny and was not intended to be funny. He hurt himself by his words as much as he did Kobe Bryant.

    The folks at ESPN who have played this out into some kind of clash of cultures should be ashamed of themselves. I heard one of the talking heads wonder just what the nature of the relationship between Kobe and Shaq was and how this might affect that relationship. Spare me…!

    The Sheriff needs to cut back on the caffeine. If Shaq was worth giving an honorary deputy sheriff badge in the first place, then this rap is not a reasonable justification for taking it away from him. Honorary deputy sheriffs have all the societal impact of butterfly farts.

By the way, for the lawyers in the audience, what might be the outcome if Shaq sued the Sheriff on First Amendment grounds alleging that his loss of a “job” was due to the Sheriff infringing on his free speech rights? It might be an interesting legal case except for the fact that it would give a longer lifetime to that embarrassing and offensive “rap video”.

A high school basketball player is thinking of skipping his “one-and-done” year in college on his way to the NBA by going to Europe to play professional basketball there. It is a long story and has to do with his multiple SAT test scores needed to achieve a level whereby he could play as a freshman at Arizona. If he is good enough to play in Europe, I say good for him. The NBA rule says he has to be one year out of high school to enter the NBA Draft; it does not say – and it would not dare say – that he had to spend a year playing NCAA basketball.

Some gloom-and-doomers say this will send a stampede of kids to Europe instead of college. So what? Is living and playing in Europe so much worse than living and playing at a college? It’s not like any of the “one-and done” players are going to take 30 credit-hours per semester and study Greek Literature in their year at school. In fact, they probably will not attend more than 10 hours of class in their second semester.

Two factors will mitigate against a torrent of “one-and-doners” raining down on Europe:

    1. Most European leagues have limits on the number of “imported players” that can be on any team roster.

    2. US passports will be harder to come by for some of these kids with arrest records and potential outstanding warrants and judgments standing as barriers.

Nevertheless, I wish that all of the “one-and-doners” would go to Europe and not to college here in the US. Maybe then, the NCAA would focus as much as 1% of its attention to the “scholar” portion of “scholar-athlete”. What am I saying? Despite his voluminous rhetorical gas, that will never happen under the leadership of the anamitronic suit dummy known as Dr. Myles Brand.

Oh, by the way, Wimbledon is underway and they have not had rain postponements yet. That can only mean that TCBFKAP has not been to London this week…

Finally, Greg Cote had this comment in the Miami Herald last weekend:

“Wimbledon starts Monday, and Roger Federer will try to extend his 58-match winning streak on grass courts. Federer is believed to be the most successful performer on grass since Cheech & Chong.”

But don’t get me wrong, I love sports…

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